vindicated

where is the line
between
playing the victim
and
being the victim?

if the point in
playing the victim
is to obtain
sympathy
and
be rescued,

and there is
no sympathy
no pity
no comfort
in sight,

isn't the likely
conclusion
that you
are not
p l a y i n g
the victim,

you
a r e
the victim?

well, I am not
vindicated.

I will never claim
there is not
blood
on my hands

that I
have never
used my words
as darts

vindication
does not lie
in the knowledge
I resorted to
sharp
steeled
weapons
only when I was
nearly drowning
in a pool of my own blood

self preservation
is no excuse
but apologies are
unnecessary
immaterial
and useless
now
and the words
stick in my mouth
like rotten molasses

yes,
there is a victim here
and you can recognize that
by the scarlet
footprints
across the pavement
where I picked myself
up off the ground
and walked away
[after all,
when you are
your own savior,
the calvary
always
arrives]

why don't you
do the same
and we'll call it even?